When Jim and I were first married, we were dirt poor, young(really young), college students(well. He was a college student.)
Aww. Look at us. Why the heck am I so very glittery??
I was working at a salon down the street. Not even lying, my very first paycheck was for $12.50. I had done one manicure that week.
Jim was going to school and working as a server at Cheddar’s.
We rarely saw each other. We’d see each other in the mornings and miss each other completely in the evenings. He would head in to work around 5 and not get home until after close, usually sometime around midnight.
I didn’t have any friends yet, because I had just moved to Joplin. I was lonely and spent a lot of time by myself.
Enter: Agatha. Nickname: Aggie. Genus: Felis
*ps. If my former landlords ever read this post, just know that I’m really, really, really, very sorry we broke your rules and never told you about it. In fact, the rule follower in me still cringes every time I think about it.
We were renting a duplex that specifically stated, NO PETS. But, I was lonely and Jim had a co-worker whose cat had just had a litter of “free” kittens. He thought to himself, “Hey, my sweet wife is so lonely all by herself every evening and she loves cats. I think I’ll get her a free friend”
The free kitten that came with fleas and worms. And needed food. And a litter box. And toys. And shots. Who need to be declawed and have her baby maker shut down. etc. etc. etc.
But, OF COURSE the moment he walked through the door with her, I was completely smitten and in love and she wasn’t going anywhere. No siree.
Until. She refused to potty train. Have you ever heard of a cat that refused to potty train? I mean, was like, actually trained, but would choose a corner and look at you with this smirk face that was like, hey there! I’ve been holding this for 10 hours just so you can see me go even though it’s on RENTED CARPET? Yeah. That was her. Nothing worked. Foil. Smelly spray to keep her away. Keeping her locked up. Spraying her with water. She was like, psssh don’t EVEN care friend. (cuz really, cats are the worst come to find out)
So the fateful day came that we were going to have to give her away. But, my sweet Dad felt so badly for me and didn’t want me to have to give away my newly acquired kitten so they offered to keep her at their house until we weren’t living on RENTED CARPET anymore.
Then, she could just pee on our MORTGAGED CARPET instead.
9 months pass. Jim graduates college. Gets a new job. We buy a house.
Aggie returns. Fortunately, without quite the propensity for peeing all over floors.
Unfortunately, she still retained her “You’re a chick and you’re imposing on my man(meaning, Jim) and I hate you” vibe. The one that went like this, “Hey female owner. I’m going to sit silently under your side of the bed EVERY SINGLE NIGHT and when you walk by I’m going to completely bite your leg like a dog. Oh, and if you try to outsmart me by running and jumping into bed I’ll just wait until you’re almost asleep…and THEN I’ll pounce on your face. And bite you.”
But no worries, she also attacked Jim as well. Just more in a loving I just want a small taste of your man flesh kind of way.
She was the weirdest blend of cat personality I’ve ever seen in my life. She totally loved being around people. She wasn’t skittish. She wanted to be in the room with you, sitting on you(and whatever you were doing. Of course), and she loved being pet. Until. Suddenly she didn’t anymore. In which case, she’d mutilate your arm.
Also? She always blinked in pictures. Why would a cat blink having their picture taken??
I put up with her for a nice long time(5 years). Cuz I’m a softie and loved her to pieces even though she was terrible. TERRIBLE. Also? I knew no one would want a middle aged cat who bites. And that made me a sad panda. So we just kept plugging along with demon cat.
But, then Miss Abigail was born. And, that’s when I knew things just weren’t going to work anymore. Adults know when to give an animal space. When to stop petting them. Or, when to not pet them at all. Babies and toddlers don’t and I couldn’t have my baby being hurt by her.
So, I was preparing to send her to a shelter, until- enter stage right- my awesome in-laws. Aggie went to live at the magical farm people always tell their kids their pets went to, when they actually go to a shelter instead. But yeah, she is foot loose and fancy free now. Killing bugs and small animals and being put in place by the other cat and dog that were there first. Perfect.
Oh yes, so to today’s prompt. “Describe a distinct moment when your life took a turn”
The day we got rid of Aggie.
I felt so guilty. So, so guilty. All the way up to the day we gave her to my in-laws. And then? We drove home. And it was like angels sang.
Never have I ever made a better decision in my life.
My house is pet hair free.
My floors are litter free.
My eBay listings can now say, “smoke free AND pet free home”
My laundry room has a drying rack instead of cat food and a litter box.
I don’t have to run and jump into bed anymore(though I totally still do. habit)
The moral of the story here is this, kids. If you actually do have a magical farm that you can send your devil animal to and you can’t quite decide whether you should? Let me be the one to tell you, DO IT. It will change your life, only for the better.